I think one of the hardest things to do is to forgive yourself when things haven’t gone right.

I had a shit month, guys. Pardon the potty mouth but it’s true. Behind the Instagram filter I dealt with my worst month ever chronic illness wise. Every day has been a struggle. Workouts few and far between. I failed my DietBet. Any energy that was available was me getting to and from work. I tried so hard to get better and nothing has worked so far. It sucked, really really sucked. 

I dealt with symptoms of my chronic illness that I had only heard about from others that also have it. In case you’re new to this part of town, I have Postural Orthostatic Tacyacardia Syndrome (POTS). I was diagnosed in 2012 and for four years have had mild to moderate symptoms, stuff I could handle with some lifestyle modifications. Those medications include a high salt diet, exercise, compression socks, rest, lots of fluids. Currently I feel moderate to borderline severe symptoms and it feels debilitating. I have no idea when this flare will end. 

I want nothing more than to hit my goal weight. I want to feel like that success story. But I need to forgive myself to move forward. To stop the negative cycle of blame and doubt. I have been doing a very poor job doing so. It’s like when you eat that entire pizza and then beat yourself up for it. Life somethings just happens, and whether you have control or not, it’s really all about moving forward. 

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