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What does the word natural mean? When it comes to weight loss, to lose weight naturallywell, that definition can be broad. To one it is intuitive eating and to another it is tracking macros. How do we figure out what is right for us?

Oprah loses 26 pounds, gains $12.5M on Weight Watchers stock” article by USA Today caught my eye as I was scrolling through the news yesterday. Besides the article, I also noticed the comments section. Oh the lovely comments section where everyone is a critic. Although most of debate was about bread, some debate was over the Weight Watchers diet. It got me thinking, does the definition of what is natural diet only depend on the user?

I have been my own personal test subject when it comes to diets, non-diets, lifestyles, programs, whatever you want to call it. Some were successful and some were over in a matter of days. As years tick on, I feel more confused than empowered. My weight stalls leaving me upset, disappointed, discouraged, and overwhelmed year after year. I tell myself “I want to do this naturally!” and desperate to do it as such. My definition of natural is no tracking, eating mindfully, be in tune with my body’s hunger signals. I have refused up and down that tracking for life is a natural thing to do, stubborn to change my thinking.

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Stubborn, but was okay with being a girl who couldn’t fit into a pair of snowboard pants.

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Stubborn, but was okay because I wasn’t as fat as I once was.

I follow blogger Skinny Meg, who follows macro counting or If It Fits Your Macros (IIFYM). This woman is textbook proof that for her, managing macros nutrients helped her achieve her goals. Reading post after post of hers, I would sit in awe and wonder why I couldn’t have similar success. I realize I was too busy being pouty in the corner trying to do this the natural way.

Rejoining Weight Watchers on New Year’s Eve was comical to me. My internal dialogue kept screaming “This isn’t the natural way, turn back now!” but I swiped my credit card regardless. I made a pact to track and reshape my definition of natural. I need food management as a part of my life. Stop fighting it. Stop thinking you know better. You are a beginner. Do not feel like a failure because you have to pull out your phone to see the nutritional value for an item.

My starting weight on 12/31/15 was based off of a weight result I received while on a cruise vacation. I was literally horrified by the number. They should never weigh people in the evening with full clothes on but with a public scale, modesty is a must. Actually, weighing people on vacation should be illegal. I deducted five pounds from the ship scale to account for clothes and made that my starting weight. On 1/28/16, I am -11.7 pounds less than my starting weight.

-11.7 pounds in a month. *insert many emoji faces here*. I was reluctant to share this number and even more so, skeptical if I should feel excited. I have worked very hard to be kind to myself and distance myself from the almighty number.  I have told myself that weight loss is boring. Right now it feels amazing. Right now it feels like it is working. Right now, it is off to track another meal and plan another workout.

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